Every day, millions of immigrant families in the United States live under a constant threat of deportation. Nearly five million American children fear being separated from their parents due to raids and immigration policies. This fear can profoundly affect their emotional health and development.
A recent report revealed that the anti-immigrant policies of the first Trump administration (2017–2021) intensified fears in children, causing behavioral changes, sleep and eating disturbances, stress-related physical symptoms, and an increase in mental health problems.
“Detention, family separation, and/or fear of separation from family members are very frightening and stressful experiences for children,” warns the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).
Prolonged fear can lead to toxic stress, damaging the developing brain and increasing the risk of long-term illnesses such as depression, diabetes, and heart problems.
Although the emotional impact is serious, experts agree that parents and caregivers can take steps to make children feel safe and supported. Here are the main recommendations:
Start by asking what they know
The first step is to ask what they have heard and how they feel about it. According to the Child Parent Institute, it is essential to listen actively to correct misunderstandings and provide simple, clear explanations.
Instead of overwhelming them with information, respond in a compassionate and age-appropriate manner. You can explain, for example, that an immigrant is someone who moves to another country in search of a better life, and that deportation means that some people are sent back to their country because they do not have a paper to let them stay.
“Children are hearing these terms from others, so it’s typically better that they obtain accurate information directly from a caretaker,” advises the National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN).
Create a trusting environment
Child psychologists agree that it is essential to talk to children honestly and calmly. The NCTSN recommends that caregivers talk to children about deportation and separation in an open and developmentally appropriate manner. According to their guide, “[h]aving an open conversation, at the child’s developmental level, can help to address worry…”
Validates their emotions
Validating their emotions is also key. Instead of saying “don’t be afraid” or “it’s okay,” experts suggest acknowledging the child’s feelings and reassuring them that it’s okay to have those feelings when thinking about possible separation from family members. Remind them that you are there to protect them.
Although not all children, especially younger ones, have the words to express their feelings, you can encourage them to express themselves through drawings.
Provide concrete reassurance without false promises
Children need to know what would happen if the adults around them cannot be there. The amount of detail you share should be appropriate for the child’s age; for example, young children need above all to feel protected.
In that case, explain the immediate steps: who will take them to school, whom they would stay with if mom or dad can’t be there, and emphasize that there will always be adults who love and care for them no matter what, recommends NCTSN.
For teens, focus on solutions
With teenagers, it is important to discuss possible scenarios and help them plan how to act if, for example, they are questioned or detained, suggests the Child Parent Institute. These conversations give them a sense of preparedness and control.
Honesty without scaremongering
False assurances, such as “don’t worry, nothing will happen,” are not advisable, because if a separation does occur, the emotional impact can be devastating.
It is better to say: “We don’t think it will happen, but we have a plan, and whatever happens, you will be well taken care of.” This sincerity, adapted to their age, gives them confidence that you are telling them the truth and have everything under control.
Prepare a family plan
One of the main recommendations from specialized organizations is to prepare a family plan. This includes gathering important documents (birth certificates, lawyers’ contact information, notarized authorizations), designating who will care for the children if the parents cannot be present, and discussing what to do in an emergency, using clear language.
Maintaining routines
The AAP emphasizes that maintaining daily routines is essential to reducing childhood anxiety. The organization stresses that “knowing what to expect can help your child feel safe and secure.” This includes keeping to schedules for meals, homework, playtime, and sleep.
Limit alarming information
Limiting constant access to alarming news or panic-filled conversations in front of children also helps reduce stress. In its guide on how to help children manage anxiety, the AAP advises “[avoiding] talking about your own concerns in front of your child. Limit your child’s exposure to the news.”
Editor’s note: This article was originally written in Spanish and translated into English by Tilde Language Justice Cooperative
